how the Lord loves me

Pain is felt
I hurt inside
I want to run
I want to disappear

I don't want to disappoint.
I want to do what's "right"
But a lot of the times now
I just want to separate myself
from your ever-present
unhappiness
and
anger

I know it must not be me that caused it
It must be the old demons from your past
But it still feels like it's me
since I always make you
uncomfortable and maybe ashamed?

I came home
and
reminded myself
of how the Lord loves me
warts
and all
and how I don't make him
uncomfortable when
I'm hanging around.

Ah, prayer.
Ahh, my heavenly Father.

I fall into your hands
and
breathe
~B